Part III, by Alissa

As he continued to gaze down at the street, his worried eyes framed beneath his furrowed brow, something caught his attention: A large truck whizzed past his building, resplendent with its crustacean mascot. His stomach lurched. Not only would he be forced to move to the slums of West Village, but with his decreased popularity and no doubt, subsequent termination from his role of Den-mother on Project Runway, he'd be forced to accept Andrae's many invitations to join him for a Red Lobsterfest. His stomach had become accustomed to regular helpings of pate, escargot and various other foods he that could satiate not only his appetite but his love for speaking with a foreign accent. Surely he could never stomach food from an establishment that boasts its Roasted Tilapia in a Bag.

At that moment of deep despair, Tim had a flash of divine inspiration. He would go through a naturalization ceremony and officially become an American citizen...